How Life Shows You What Will Happen Next

Some people think that the future is yet to be written and we have the free will to change what will happen, and some people think that it was written long before we arrived here. One thing is for sure, nobody really knows, and it doesn't really matter. What is important is how we feel about this unknown future that we're moving towards.

The future can be scary and unpredictable. We can fear it and have anxiety about it or we can be excited about it. And although some people profess to be able to predict the future, the majority of us can't.

What we can do though is to start looking at the patterns that our lives are following. And in our own way, we can start understanding and feeling better about where our futures are going. So what are these patterns?

Well, the patterns are the repeated ways that the situations in our lives follow. From time to time, we find ourselves in a situation that feels familiar. A type of situation that we've been in before.

This type of situation could be a bad thing that we don't want to happen or something that we don't want to do in the future. They are things that we are not looking forward to and things that will disrupt our lives in some way. But after worrying about this thing constantly and dreading the day it happens, we always reach a point where this thing just goes away.

Something always comes up so that this thing is not going to happen anymore. And then we think, why was I worrying? It's not going to happen.

But , the worrying is the most important part about it. We don't also need the pain of going through it as well. So we move on with our lives and then sure enough, somewhere down the road, another bad thing that we don't want to happen comes up.

Is it going to happen? We just have to wait and see. But when we get there, most importantly, we need to remember that this next thing also didn't happen.

Now we are building the evidence and starting to trust the pattern. So as I said before, we don't know if the future is written or if we create it but one thing is for sure, the future is not random. If it was, there wouldn't be any patterns.

So if we pay attention to the patterns and the way things turn out, we will have a better idea of what will happen. And most importantly, we can stop worrying so much and trust that this time, as it was last time, everything will turn out fine. Another pattern that happens to us is when we're in a situation that goes comically wrong.

These are situations that don't have any repercussions for our future; they are just stand-alone stupid situations. At these times, we are trying our best but we make a mistake, or we miss something or someone misunderstands us. And there's no way we can save the situation.

No matter how hard we try. The main theme of these situations is feeling embarrassed. Being embarrassed is very important for us because it keeps us humble.

Spotting Difficult People—And Protecting Your Peace

Everybody is different, and it’s impossible to get along with everybody, but I want to. I don’t want to have bad feelings between me and anybody in my life. But sometimes I do upset people and although it’s not on purpose I can’t find any way to avoid it.

So instead I just don’t take it personally. Maybe a little pain is good for them. I also find in my life that different people play different roles.

And by that I mean that there are a set number of characters and different people have filled those same roles in different times of my life. I’ll give you an example. For me there’s always that one person who gives me what I categorize as “trouble”.

If this person is in the workplace then the trouble could be them criticizing me for how I’m doing my job, or it could be them saying something like I might need to work on my day off. And often to someone else this trouble doesn’t seem very bad at all, but to me, it feels like the worst thing ever. And as my life has changed of course so have the people, but sure enough I’ll be having trouble from one specific person again and again, and then I’ll realize that they are now filling that role.

But this is the important thing for me. Identifying them is one part of it but because I know who they are I can “expect” to have trouble from them at any time and I can be ready for it. I can also react differently to them because now their role in my life has been clearly identified.

One strategy I have is to not react to what they say. As in the example earlier they might be saying that I need to do work on my day off or that something is going to happen at work that wouldn’t be good for me. But in the end it turns out that I don’t need to work or that the work thing doesn’t happen.

I used to freak out and worry about what they had said, but now this has happened so many times over the years, with the person I’ve identified as the trouble-person, that I’ve learned to not react to what they say and just trust that it’s really not going to happen. Another trend in my life that I’ve noticed is that people are often rude to me or say insensitive things seemingly without even realizing it. Or people ignore me when I say something, and it’s as if I haven’t even said a word.

How I deal with this is to, you guessed it, not react. The best thing by far for me to do is to let it go immediately, or if what I’ve said has been ignored I don’t pursue it or try to say it again. I take it as being something that I need to hear about myself or something that I shouldn’t have said.

But I’ve gotten used to people acting very strangely around me and as I said before, I just have to not take it personally. Another thing that happens which I’m never sure is good or bad is that people often share their problems with me or personal things about themselves, whether I’m close with them or not. Of course, it’s great that they can confide in me, but I will rarely give them advice.

Giving advice is dangerous. How can I possibly know what the best course of action is?