Recognising the Purpose of This Period of Your Life

Our lives have purpose, or to be more accurate, our lives have many purposes. As we go through our lives, each period has its own purpose. But a purpose is not something that we make up by ourselves.

It's something that already exists in our lives. We have one right now in this part of our lives. Either we don't know what it is or it's something that we are already doing, but we haven't acknowledged it as our purpose.

So if we don't know what it is, then we are missing an opportunity to achieve it. Also, if we did know what it was, we could more clearly focus on it and get a more meaningful experience from it. But let's take a step back for a second and ask, what is a purpose?

A purpose is a goal in a specific area of our lives. It is something that can only be achieved by us but could be for us or for the people around us. So how can we find the purpose of this part or any part of our lives?

We need to be careful here because there could be something that we want our purpose to be or something that we feel strongly that our purpose is, but really it isn't. So how can we know that something is our real purpose? That's really down to what is generating the need for that purpose.

Always, a purpose is wrapped up in our daily lives. It is related to the main theme of what we are going through at the time, so it could be related to work, family, or our private lives. So in one of these areas, the need for that purpose keeps trying to get our attention more than anything else, and while we are in this particular period of our lives, it will keep coming up and making itself known to us.

It could be a problem, an issue, or something we keep thinking about more than anything else. It could be an area that causes stress or where we get criticized by others, or a place where there's conflict. But it's definitely something that repeats.

, it's down to us. When we are trying to find it, it will bring with it a "knowing" that it's the right thing. There is nothing more valuable than really knowing something.

And we must remember that "knowing" is a feeling, not just a thought. So once we've identified what that thing is, the next step is to work out what we need to be doing about it. So what is a purpose trying to do?

Every purpose, of course, is trying to improve our lives in a small or sometimes a big way. But it's best to think of them as building blocks on the way to a bigger purpose. So we should look for how we can elevate the particular situation we have identified and how our input can alter it.

Purposes are pieces of the puzzle that help us make gains in our lives if we can focus on them and commit to them. And, of course, while we are pursuing a purpose, it brings us all of the experiences that go along with working towards that purpose. And these experiences help to shape and change us.

And we mustn't forget that it's okay if we make a mistake finding the purpose for this period of our lives, as long as we realize and try again. If we are wrong, we'll soon find out because we'll meet a lot of resistance to what we are doing. That's not to say that our purpose won't be challenging, but if it becomes unreasonably difficult, then we are on the wrong track.

Owning Your Part (Without Blame) to Find Freedom

The worst thing I can do to someone is to try to control them. Trying to control them takes away their choices and their freedom. Individual freedom is very important, and nobody wants to feel like they can't decide for themselves what to do or that they can't choose the thing that they want.

One of the places where I have to be especially careful is with my kids. They are still fairly young, so I need to tell them what to do, but I've found that there is a line that I shouldn't cross. A line where I can control them too much.

I also, of course, have to be careful when I'm talking to my wife. Sometimes what I think is advice comes across too strongly and to her seems like me telling her what to do. And when I cross this line, it's usually because of the tone that I used or my choice of words.

And of course, I experience people trying to control me as well. People try to control me all the time into doing things they want me to do that I don't want to. And this pressure can come from them using their position or status, or their relationship with me.

I used to get pulled into doing a lot of things that I didn't really want to just because I thought I should. And I would dread doing those things, and it would make me unhappy. Now my strategy for this is to not react or commit to anything at the time the person is saying it and then later to just do the thing that I want to do.

There are never any repercussions for me from using this strategy, and the result is always that I'm happier. Another thing that I used to do is to try to change situations. Usually because I know better, which is obviously not true.

And of course, this caused conflict for me with the people around me. But then I started to pick up on the signs better and to back off and stop trying to manipulate the situation to how I wanted it to be. Most of my motivation was purely selfish anyway, and I just wanted the situation to suit me and what I wanted.

But I found that letting things develop naturally and letting other people's input guide the situation brings good results for everyone. So then a lot of my trouble and conflict with people comes from me. And even though I often think that it's other people's fault, probably eighty percent of it started from me.

I'm not talking about huge problems or big arguments either; I'm talking about even the very small things, like how a conversation goes. I want everything, including my everyday interactions, to go smoothly. This requires me to be sensitive or even hypersensitive to the flow of the conversation and the motivations of the people involved.

And because I'm not fixed on a certain outcome, my input isn't too strong, and I have hopefully avoided any conflict.